This week was h.a.r.d. I'm not a crier by any stretch (unless we're watching a movie about the Olympics.) and there were some definite tears shed this week. Mostly due to lots of flem and not being able to breathe. I've tried to write this post at least five times today, but my mood changes every 10minutes so I'm not getting anywhere. So I made a list of thoughts.
1. Praise whomever made amoxicillin, because I really thought we were headed to the hospital this week.
2. I'm really excited for our ultrasound this week.
3. I need it to be a girl, not because I want a girl, I want a healthy baby boy or girl. I need it to be a girl because that's what my gut tells me and I need to be right about something. I need a little victory.
4. I started crying in the middle of the night just because my husband is going to be such a good Dad.
5. Every once in awhile I see pictures of twins and I'm jealous that both my babies aren't coming in December.
6. Current hobbies include snap chatting reviews making fun of the Bachelorette, and yelling at the tv during Master Chef Junior.
7. Sometimes I wonder if I share too much, or should find a different outlet when things are stupid hard rather than posting about them. But really every single time my tribe likes/comments/commiserates with me and I feel better.
8. Currently debating waking up Scott to see if he wants to go with me to go get stuff to make smores. It's 1:41am.
9. Listening to Harry Potter before bed really calms me down and helps me sleep.
10. It's July 1st! Month 2 of Summer hibernation! I was scrolling through the call log on my phone and it's filled with Dr's, Scott, my sisters, and my mom.
11. During the holidays at Kneaders it was so stressful, by the time I hit December 1st I would only answer my phone for people I considered to be in Tier 1. Those people in #10 + family are Tier 1 currently. All of the Dr's appointments and paperwork and worrying about the placenta is really just about all I can handle right now, it's not that I don't try and be social (I'm still trying!) but a lot of days what's on my plate is all the emotional energy I have to give. While I feel good about being able to recognize that, it also wears on me because I want to be a good friend, visiting teacher, etc. So if you're one of those people not mentioned know that I love you and keep trying. You never know when there's a good day we can take advantage of! So many emotions!
12. I gave up on pretending to have all my baby updates all shiny and perfect. They really haven't been since week six, but I really like how they're coming together. Because they're honest and they're a real snapshot of what pregnancy was like for us. I do try and look for something that genuinely made me happy that week.
13. This week that happy thing is realizing how much joy we get as a couple from doing hard things together. This pregnancy has been HARD. But dangit we're still laughing and planning and talking to the baby and enjoying the process. Because nothing makes us happier than knowing we're parents and we're working and fighting to get this baby home. We make a great team.
***this blog is sponsored by pregnancy hormones and not being allowed any ADD meds until after the baby is done nursing. ***